5 Community Partnership Principles

I have been strongly reminded this month that this neighborhood work is a messy work.

Contrary to popular belief, I'm not here to just provide a community service (trash pick-up, put out fires, repave a road...), I am here to empower and equip people to improve their neighborhoods.

These are 5 of my principles that I think makes for a good neighborhood partnership.

1. Empowerment: If you come to me with your hand out, I ask that you reach into your own pocket first, then take a quick inventory of what and who you know to help you accomplish the task.
   
2. Ownership: I can assist you, I can guide you, but you have to do it. It isn't mean to say no, because it is often the only way the effort will last and it will mean something to you for accomplishing it. Start simple and grow as your resources grow.
   
3. Respect: Value your partners, when you undermine the work they do, they will not run to your aid so quickly the next time. Stand up for them, respect them, challenge them, and be honest with them.
   
4. Unity: It has to be done together and can not be done alone, each person has a role they can fulfill better than most others. Do it, do it well, and do it together.
   
5. Adaptability: Everyone starts at a different place, so what has worked for one may not work for another. Treat everyone fairly, not necessarily the same.

Love Thy Neighbor as...Mr. Stokes

Sgt. Harmon F. Stokes , 83

Harmon F. Stokes, 83, passed from this life suddenly last Wednesday in his home and was laid to rest surrounded by his friends and family today. Harmon was a Sargent in the US Army, serving in both the Korean and Vietnam conflicts, and retiring with 45 years of military and civil service.


If that was the end of the story, most people would generally say something like, "how sad, I'm so sorry," "he lived a full life," or "he is at rest now." These would all be true but they don't represent the greater story. I can only share the special stories that I know and the memories of his character I heard echoed in today's service. This story also captures a glimpse of why I am a public servant and why I answered a calling to "do good stuff," as the late Mike Canty used to describe it.


My first memories of Mr. Stokes go back about 12 years, to the first neighborhood I ever worked in - historic Aberdeen Gardens. I was 21 years old and was just learning about youth leadership development and community organizing. I hadn't organized a group in my life and in Aberdeen I was responsible for leading the youth initiatives for this prominent and established community. I was taking this role over from someone else without any training or transition. I was even a bit apprehensive concerning my welcome into this group I knew little about. I realize now that I was also facing my own fears regarding my cultural, generational, and social perspectives. Despite these internal struggles of an introverted organizer, one warm smile and a firm handshake wiped them far away, that of Mr. Stokes.

Historic Aberdeen Gardens in Hampton, Virginia

I still remember how I'd call on him to open up the Aberdeen Museum for me, a restored home in the neighborhood that served as a central meeting place for the 5 youth that participated in the youth group. Mr. Stokes was always there with a smile to open up the building. The youth group wouldn't be me greatest success thus far in my career and I remember on more than one occasion being the only one at the museum. Then along came Mr. Stokes, waiting there with me, taking time out of his day to check in on me, learning about my family, college classes i was taking, and just doing what he could to make feel apart of the community. At every Aberdeen breakfast or event I always looked for Mr. Stokes, because his smiling welcome always made me feel like I belonged in Aberdeen. The last time I talked to Mr. Stokes he asked, as he always did, how my "lovely wife" and "those little ones" were doing.


From those first years in Aberdeen, my heart was bound to that special community in a unique way. I saw something in Mr. Stokes and the many other Aberdeeners I have come to know and love. I learned that your neighbor is more than the resident in the house that is next to your, the one that just lives near you. A truly good neighbor is one that is "near." They near enough to ask about your day, near enough to lend a hand, near enough to cheer you up with a "hello," near enough to look out for you, near enough to make you feel at home, and near enough mourn and lift you up when things are tough.

The Aberdeen Gardens Museum, Mary Peake Blvd

Mr. Stokes had the special ability to make you feel like the most important person to him at that time. He knew how to give, and he knew how to serve. His strong and protective nature made you feel honored to have him on your side. I can unashamedly say they he is on a short list of reasons why I continue in public service. After struggling with some random bureaucratic challenge, all I had to do was to get a call or visit from Mr. Stokes, and I would remember instantly why I chose this field - to help good people like him, "do good stuff."


The faith and love of Christ from Mr. Stokes doesn't make this day bitter in the least, because I know I will see my brother in Christ from Aberdeen one day soon. Yes, it is a bit sad that others won't be able to be blessed by such an example as Mr. Stokes. I do know he lived a much fuller life than I will ever have a chance to ask him about. I also know that he is walking the streets of heaven with his dear wife and I can only hope that I have home in heaven with Mr. Stokes as my neighbor. Until then, may I be the neighbor to others that he was to me. Even though we lived miles apart he was always be my good neighbor.

Who are the People in Your Neighborhood?

I recently presented at the Virginia Statewide Neighborhood Conference on the power of Community Stakeholders. The core message was that "resources exist in communities to do great things but knowing the networks and how to access them are key." We explored how to breakdown the traditional gatekeeper barriers and look for key trust agents that can serve as advocates for your community initiatives. Below is the link to the Prezi that I used. The accompanying group activity will be added later but you can see the instructions in the presentation. Feel free to share and tailor it for your own group.

Who Are the People in Your Neighborhood:
The Power of Community Stakeholders

Community Stakeholders on Prezi

I couldn't post this presentation without a quick shout out to my first civic engagement mentor: Bob from Sesame Street...

Awsome resource on community development!

 I was reading Janice Foster's blog (Grassroots Grantmaking) and saw a publication from Indianapolis that might be of use.

What an awesome resource! Well worth the read and definitely deserves sharing for any neighborhood or community leader. The material applies to multiple areas and fields of work. Definitely a worthwhile resource!

Read her review and download a copy of the Organizers Workbook here.

Diets, Dollars, and Dialogue

A new year brings new resolutions, new goals, and new hope. January reminds us that last year is now truly history and we've been given the opportunity to have a year to change what we did or did not do the year before. Many choose to change their diets, their spending, their friends, their routines.

At this point in the month, many of us have already given up on at least one of our planned changes. I guess you can say many of us have "failed" in some area of our life. I recently was in a class by a successful local businessman who emphasized the fact that we only truly fail not when we fail to succeed but fail to continue to try. But even still many of us tend to hold out hope that we will start the change "next week."

Change is a relative term. I believe that this is especially true in this most recent election and new presidency, with change as a key topic of discussion and motivation for millions in the last election. Millions became involved on a historic scope, in many areas of the country because they hope in the prospect of change. Some may hope for change in the middle eastern wars, the economy, abortion laws, marriage laws, drug enforcement, fossil fuels, climate change, or the way our democracy is run.

I must be honest and say that I have been intrigued with Obama's presidency this first week. From inauguration, to GITMO, and economic recovery discussions, I have been listening for my own version of change - a change in dialogue. So often politicians are elected to represent a constituency, but unlike true statesmen, they fail to do build a broad enough constituency to develop fair dialogue on the issues they are faced with. Political community organizing is often done to advance an agenda, secure a re-election, or prevent an opposing group from gaining ground. I hope to explore the idea of dialogue and deliberative democracy in the next few weeks.

In the mean time, check out some entries from some others on this issue.

Organizing for America (Social Capital)
"Start Listening" (Harwood Institute)

People Power (Peter Levine)

Consider what your approach to these tough issues of change have been. Are you looking for root causes, common areas of agreement, or just differences? How can this new administration foster local organization and dialogue around these national, state and local issues to bring effective, realistic and transformational change?